It's happening!

So I'm finally making some progress and seeing more hope. Not gonna lie things still get really rough, but I'm able to handle it. Okay seriously, everyone should have a sponsor for life. It's awesome to have someone to talk to whenever you need them...like they are just always there for you. And mine is so great because it's like she's a sober version of me. :D

     So like I'm going back to treatment for a few days just so I can get stepped down to php and have it covered by insurance. So my addict mind started racing and I was like man I really wanna get messed up before I go back. What's the point in staying sober when I'm going back to treatment. So I made this extravagant plan on how I was going to get really messed up for a few days. This plan would seriously probably ruin my life, really hurt everyone I love and possibly put myself in danger. So I was like really excited about it and then I started thinking about how bad this would hurt my family and just really ruin all the progress I've made. Then someone from treatment needed some support and I was there to help them and then I realized if I wouldn't have been sober last night, I would not have been able to help her. So then I just had like a spiritual awakening type thing and had no desire to use. This is like super cool because I could have got some really good stuff and for an addict that is not easy to say no to. But God took my desire away and I am so grateful for that. I went through a lot of hard emotions the past 24 hours and I stayed sober. I met with my sponsor and now I feel so much better :D! I'm so proud of myself. It feels really good wanting to be sober. I love it! :D I feel like I've just babbled a lot. Oh well I just had to tell you guys about this! :D
Thanks for reading!